Top Ten Fashion Trends from 2010 that need to DIE in the coming year:

31 Dec

10. dress shorts: they’re great in concept but come on. at the end of the day? they’re shorts and they are not to be worn from season to season

9. open toed shoes: why is this still a thing? are we serious? do you people not live in places that get cold? or any sort of precipitation? stop it. for the sake of your little piggies.
8. open toed BOOTS:  stop this. immediately. you know exactly why.

7. wayfarer sunglasses: are we done with this yet? a trend officially dies when you see 4th graders rocking them, right?
6. silly bands: while we’re on the subject of 4th graders, adults need to stop wearing these things, am I right? is no one else bothered by how messy they look? I want to straighten them out when I see them on people’s arms. also? you’re an adult. that’s enough.
5. people trying to dress up like mad men characters in everyday life: listen, i am all for dressing up and getting fancy and stuff? but its exhausting doing it every day. and you’re making everyone else look bad. throw on a jersey shift dress and move along.
4. over the knee boots: unless you are going to a costume party dressed as a 16th century seafaring explorer or as Julia Roberts in pretty woman, this is an INAPPROPRIATE shoe choice.
3. I’ve called for the end of bows for years now and I will keep on doing so until grown ass women stop wearing them like their 6 year olds on easter sunday.
2. YSL tribute pumps and any knock off variation thereof: has everyone given these mad overpriced stripper shoes a try yet? is everyone sufficiently pleased with themselves for skanking it up in $300 shoes that you can buy at la la shoes in hollywood for $25? did everyone feel super sexy for a second for pretending to be a stripper with cloven hooves for feet? ok then. can we bury these ugly things already? shame on you YSL.
1. snuggies: at first I was like ‘you’re kidding me america’ but it turns out america was not kidding but I laughed anyway. it’s a blanket with SLEEVES for the love of christ. I didn’t think it would stick around for long outside of stoner culture. but then there were snuggie pub crawls and people started wearing them to work. enough is enough. learn how to layer or something. DONT BE WEARING THAT SHIT IN PUBLIC. YOU ARE MAKING THE HUMAN RACE LOOK TERRIBLE.
peace on earth, goodwill to men and no more snuggies as professional attire in 2011.

One Response to “Top Ten Fashion Trends from 2010 that need to DIE in the coming year:”

  1. yrfriendliz January 1, 2011 at 2:03 am #

    peep toe (peep-toe?) boots. HATED IT.

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